Monday, 22 June 2009

Of being tagged and spreading the Tag Virus.

I was tagged by le embrouille blogueur few days back. The task is simple, you just need to write about 10 things that makes you crazy( Not schizophrenia type crazy, something which annoys you). I am a bit odd and weird. I know every other blogger says the same about him/her, but I too am no different. Probably that’s why we connect. Probably that’s why we blog.

Whats wrong with me? I have been pondering over things which annoy me for some time now, but there aren’t many. Am I close to sainthood? Why don’t I get annoyed? Have I become super ICECOOL? I don’t know, I think there aren’t many things in this world that annoys me.

1. Judgments people pass about a person, not really knowing or understanding him. Comments like:Ohh, “he is such an ass, or OHHH, he is a total recluse”. “He is such a serious character, He is very studious, He is arrogant”, etc Annoy me (used to annoy me). The very fact is that such people haven’t really known the person they are commenting. They have just met him/her for about 10 minutes and they are branded.

2. The negativity surrounding me. I know a lot of people, mostly elderly who shoot their trap the moment you tell them about your plans or ideas. Unsolicited advises aren’t welcome, I wish I had a comment moderator in real life.

3. Forceful parents. I pity those kids in high schools who are worse than Donkeys of EGYPT by their sheer level of exploitation and torture. I was lucky that I had parents who never forced me to study, except on very few occasions. I believe parents should be guides and not Managers ( by my company standards).

4. Forceful Husbands. I don’t believe in gender domination. I love women, for their role they play so efficiently, be it mothers, sisters, wife, Girlfriends. I cannot stand men who feel macho about themselves when they ill-treat or abuse women. I admire and respect men who take up roles of a woman (in marital relationships) when the need arise (probably having seen my father do that after my mother’s death).

5. People, especially teenagers or adolescent, showing off fake attitudes. YO-YO, we are HIP and CHICK. WE ARE WILD AND HAPPENING. I hate it more when such people, from middle class upbringing abruptly adopt such attitudes, just for the heck of it, To sound cool and contemporary, and it’s apparent that it isn’t. I hate such DUDES and DUDETTES.

le embrouille blogueur, buddy, That’s about all that I have at short notice, that annoys me so much that I write it.With your permission, let me twist or modify the tag. Let me respond by writing about moments in the past which had made me go CRAZY.

6. I was caught in the act of forgery. No, I wasn’t forging a bank cheque or something of that order.I was in 10 th standard and we had an extremely strict and Hitler-like Chemistry Teacher, and being naturally lazy, I never completed my Chemistry Practical record books, until few days before the final submission. Having half of my records un checked and unsigned by her, we (myself and 3 more partners of crime) decided that it would be pretty nasty if we submit it now, since she had proclaimed that previously unsigned Record books wouldn’t be signed again, which meant we would never get any marks for them.Ta-Da, we signed for her. Almost half of the book was signed by me and the signature so close to the original that it went unnoticed by the very teacher, until she noticed the date I had mentioned below the signature. Here I go, I had signed a date for which she was away holidaying in Goa with her family and probably the beaches and the memories of Port wine she had in Goa(or the good time she had with her hubby in bed) that went against us, she immediately became aware that on such date, she can never sign this record. The entire class record books were re-scrutinized and culprits were caught. We were almost expelled from the school, but for the kindheartedness of the Principal, who felt we deserved one more chance, provided we apologize before the entire school on the podium, during the morning assembly. My apology Speech was written by my DAD, and poor man was asked to be present during my notoriously dubious speech. Being the leader of the gang, I was the first to make the speech, and I had all the hairs on my body stand up, forming billions of well formed Goosebumps. I felt my skin would peel off any moment, but thinking about it now, I feel I was lucky that I was caught. It made me learn a lesson so early in life that there is nothing in this world more worthy, than being honest and truthful. It also made me love my Father, having seen a different face altogether from his Benito Mussoloni type persona. I thought he would instantly take his Army rifle and shoot me point blank, but instead he looked into my eyes and kept his silence. That silence was much more than a thousand whacks, with a long cane on my fleshy butt. I have never repeated another such act and never will.

7. There was a girl in my school, Simi, who had hijacked my heart ever since I laid my eyes on her. And I was ridiculously shy with girls. My crush was so strong that I decided to unfasten my heart before her, but my thin and malnutritioned courage rebelled against me. It took 6 months for me to form enough courage to go and propose her; after numerous prayers and rehearsals, I zeroed on a date. It was during that time that I remember becoming awfully devotional to Sri Krishna, having read about his Long list of Girlfriends, (coming to an astronomical 16 thousand and odd. ). My prayers went something like this, “ Ohh, Krishna, The lord of Romance. We all know that you had officially recognized sixteen thousand girlfriends. Please, all I ask is for one. Please fill Simi with enough LOVE for me. Pleaseee, make her accept me, without laughing at me or creating a scene. I will be indebted to you for rest of my life. I will never ask for any more favors. Pleaseeee”…..And the outcome was………….I blabbered about 80% of my planned speech, but she chuckled so loudly that I almost felt it echo across the whole school building. My crush was crushed prematurely. When I think about it, I feel it’s one of the craziest moments in my life and will be for a long time, unless I do something crazier than that in the future. And also, I feel she laughed at me because I was in 8th standard and she was in 11th. See the age difference? Like every other guy I was drawn to more mature women. (Not anymore though).

8. I had a long series of text message chat with my Immediate boss a few years back and it so happened that he refused my leave application( in between the SMS chat over the cell phone). I was so furious and upset that I wanted to vent my anger and decided to Text my wife, and it went something like. “The bastard has refused my leave appli. Asshole, God knows what he thinks of himself. Fucker wants to go on leave and wants me to stay and manage the office”. The tragedy and comedy was, instead of sending to my wife, I sent to the boss himself in a fit of absentmindedness. OHHHH, I was out of breath for few minutes and almost choked and fainted. I got an instant reply, “Thank you. This is a nice way of showing your gratitude to me. I shall remember this for a very long time.” But I was lucky that before the time came for my annual appraisal, he had quit his job and moved to Canada.

9. I was about 10 years old and was on a summer vacation to Kerala. We decided to have a dip in the Temple pond and after hours of fooling around, were finally out of water. Having not carried any extra towel, changing the wet underwear turned out to be an extremely tricky task and the struggle to cover my modesty met with a tragic end when out of despair, I decided to go stark naked to dry clean myself before pulling on a fresh undie. As soon as I pulled my wet cover over my modesty, a bunch of aunties showed themselves, as if out of nowhere and I stood frozen in time, wonderstruck. My 10 year old body and my wiener stood on display for the giggly and girly aunties to relish and the moments carved permanently as an embarrassment memoir in my memory album.

10. Writing this blog post, remembering all those crazy moments was crazy in itself. And having written so much, let me wind up, before you guys get bugged.

Sorry for a loooong post and before I conclude, lemme tag few of my friends.

1. Anju-My first friend on the blogger. Way to go lady.

2. Jyothi: I am sure she has so much to say. Bubbling with energy, yet an aspiring superwoman.

3. Aparna: Your witty writing style would be apt for writing such a crazy post.

4. Rahul: Dude, try something off your niche. Let us know when you aren’t reviewing books.

5. Zeba: I know you are waiting to be tagged. Lets hear you talk

6. P:Hey woman, Lets hear you talk.

7. Priya: Ok, hope you won’t cover yourself under an oversized Sunglass.

8.The panorama:OK, Woman.

9.Dhanya:OK, Young Lady

10. Abstract: Dude, you are tagged, No escape now.

11. Sucharita

12: Sujata

13. Santanu Dada

14. gayathri

15. Everyone on my blog list or follow list(Pleaseeee)

And check out this blog, here. Good one, isnt it?

And anyone who wants to join….( I know that’s a ridiculous way of inviting people)..hail the Tag Virus, Amen!!!

Ciao All

P.S: Request you all to please check this site. Please take the message and lets contribute for a cause.............

Lets paint the world GREEN, Literally!!!!!!!!


Priya said...

hahhahahaha...enjoyed reading this post like "crazy".....and thanks a zillion for tagging me...u r the first one to tag me (namely) in this universe and the blogosphere .... i am more than happy....thanks a zillion dude....
and before i start with the tag..i really need to comment on your post specifically..but you know the constraints while trying to blog or comment on an interesting blog, while in office... :P...
coming back soon....till then... :D:D

Swatantra said...

Ha ha :) Amazing, very close to heart of many people like me.. It reminded me of few crazy things i did..

I had a good laugh and still laughing on the text message u wrote to ur boss accidentally!! Thanks for sharing!! Bahut mazaa aaya..

Ida said...

Oh wow!!! I got a mention...thanks zillion, zillion(I bet people keep telling that you)...I loved the thoughts you penned...ESPECIALLY point four- I hope my hubby and his father get to read this!!!!!
As for Simi, don't worry, I have done something equally crazy, if not more, by once declaring a crush for a guy 4 years younger! Thank god that phase is over and done with!!!
Keep posting!
And thanks again for the mention:)

The abstract scientist said...

Hey ZB,
I am very angry . You havent tagged me. No one tags me.

Dhanya said...

Hah! I was just waiting for someone to tag me. Long time since I did any tags. So thank you! :D

Hmmm... I hate those 'wannabe cool' dudes and dudettes too! What I hate even more is a fake accent. Drives me mad!!!

AnjuGandhi said...

if I were to start the BEST BLOG OF THE DAY AWARD, then it would have surely this blog
any ways let me officially Announce it now.
Award I will send you later ( once I come up with something really impressive)
i enjoyed it thoroughly
and thanx for calling me your first friend on the blogging group.
Long live blogging friendship

Anonymous said...

Excellent Post. Enjoyed reading. What is life..if we dont have any memories to look back and laugh.

Hey, i am not sure if this idea works well with you. I just came across a NGO with their website named as They are into planting the trees and saving the ecosystem. Can you add them as a one-liner in your next post so that people can have a look and contribute if they wish.

Rahul Anand said...

lol, the text sent to the boss by mistake was scary. I shudder to think about something like that

Well to write anything apart from books the following must be true:

1. There should be something interesting to write about, and right now its pretty mundane.

2. One needs good writing skills like you, else people would not bother reading about your life :-)

Thanks for tagging me :-)

Aparna said...

Thanks a lot Zillionbig for landing me in trouble. If I start writing about things that annoy me, my family will boycott me for sure. They are the root cause of all annoyance.
But what the heck, will risk it. So give me a couple of days.
Lovely post incidentally.

Anonymous said...

This has to be the craziest and yet the most interesting post I have read till date.

The Boss one is the best...Would love to be in that situation. Ha ha ha

Thanks for the tag...My first one...I liked your description of me...Now before I get all senti..let me shortlist my extremely long list of things that annoy me....Before that do let me know if you know any good lawyers here....the civil cases kind.. ;-)

R. Ramesh said...

have fun buddy...and thanks for passing by...cheers


ha ha ha..
so funny .. really enjoyed..
each one of us hav such kind of moments. i will also try to write such 10 moments in my life..


P said...

OMG! this was like a crash course in knowing you! :)

about the rogue sms...I did a similar thing with my email..I bitched...yes literally bitched about my thesis adviser to my fiance and ended up sending it to my adviser instead! That was the end of my thesis days! Gosh! trust me u were lucky that supervisor moved away!

P said...

BTW... you introduced me to some really cool blogs! thanks! I was looking for some new stuff to read and this helps. :)

The Panorama said...

Your blog is getting better and better, Zillionbig. Really enjoyed reading this post. I gather am tagged...? Do I have to write 10 things that annoy me?
Will gladly write it, so check out my next post:) Cheerio!

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Everyone: Thanks a ton for commenting.

@Abstract Scientist: Hey, i wrote this post in one go and took a lot of energy out of me. By the ned of it, i was out of my mind so missed a lot of people. You are always there man. Now come up with your response.:))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Panorama: Thanks , especially for coming with your own response. I njoyed it. Hehe:))

SAHITYIKA: Thanks, I am waiting for your post. Come up soon..:)))

P: Was it a crash course in knowing me? Hehe, i opened up......and thanks for taking time to read..:)))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Ramesh: Thanks Buddy......I always enjoy your short but on to the point posts.:)))))))

@Jyothi: Thanks...I am waiting to see what annoys you..i am sure there is a long list...Dont bother about your family, even if you bare all, they will still be with you, your family will never get enough of you...Angry Jyothi, hehehe, Thanks:))))

@Aparna: Thanks...waiting to see the root cause of your annoyance...i am sure the root is pretty deep rooted...:))))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Rahul: Thanks for showering words of praise...It was scary and i couldnt sleep for several nights...Witing for your tag answer...:)))))))

@Anon:Thanks buddy, 4 visiting often.keep visiting....Appreciate you kind words.:)))

@Anju: No award is more than your words of praise. i am already awarded.Its always a pleasure to read you.waiting for your tag:)))))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Dhanya: Thanks buddy. waiting for your tag post...YOYO, dudes always annoy me.:))))

@Ida: Thanks, its always a pleasure to read and spread the word... i am here bcoz some else spread the word about me. so dont bother. Keep blogging:)))

@SWATANTRA: Thanks a ton. I loved reading your blogs, so waiting for your tag answers...come up soon..:)))))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Priya: Thanks. I am glad that you liked the post. Now waiting for your tag response...:))))

Swatantra said...


I havenot got any tags.. Thanks for reading my blog. I am waiting your feedback on my recent posts.. Thanks

sujata said...

Great knowing this part of sure when your kid is a toddler and refuses to give you the remote when a great match is on TV..that will top the list of annoyance..a few years from now..

Zeba Talkhani said...

How in thw world did you know that I was 'waiting' to be tagged? How? How? How? This was supposed to be a secret!!

le embrouille blogueur said...

ZB ... I read this post early yesterday and commented on it but that never got published ... I thought (maybe) you didnot like the comment...which was - this is one of the best posts I have read of yours .. it oozes of honesty and nostalgia which made me go back to my teen years .... amazing stuff dude....keep'em coming are a seasoned blogger who was waiting to post !!!

Gayathri said...

hey that was the best of all ur posts till date..
i loved that getting caught by chemi teacher stuff,even i had got caught,but not for a forgery of signature,but for writing something in the record which i havnt really performed..
and super cool yo yo babes are just as much irritating as the judging ppl.. huh!!
and not comment moderator..may be a beeper :D

thanks for the tag..

Smita said...

I was roaring with laughter when I read that poem of yours!!! Trust me it was so so cute!!!!

Loved the part 2 of the tag more than the 1st ;-)

BTW I was official forger for my office, thankfully never got caught :D

Interesting post!

R. Ramesh said...

jus to say HI....cheers

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Swatantra: You are tagged. No doubt...:)))

@Sujata: Hehe, you are right and thanks for the warning on future annoyences...i am used to it. My wife is another Soap addict, we fight when theres cricket match...:)))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Zeba: I knew it. I knew it.Its a secret how i came to know.:)))

@LEB:Thanks Dude. i didnt delete your comment, i didnt get it in the first place. I am overwhelmed by your comment. Thnaks again.:))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Gay3: Thanks , hope your exams are over. long time no posts. Hope its are coming.:))

@Smita:Thanks, you too Brutus? But its scary, i wish you good luck, never get caught. :)))

@Ramesh: Thanks Buddy for dropping by. Cheers:))

Keshi said...

Very interesting post Zillion :)

**They have just met him/her for about 10 minutes and they are branded

I so know what u mean. I think we humans need to look deeper than that and realise that NOBODY IS PERFECT. So lets just not JUDGE each other.

**I wish I had a comment moderator in real life.

Im glad we dun hv one in real life. u know why? Then we'd never know what it is to be at the receiving end of 'PAIN'. :):)

**Fake attitude

o well, they cant ACT for too long can they!


Babli said...

I liked your blog very much. Its very nice and interesting. I appreciate for the lovely post.
You are welcome in my blogs.

Emaan said...

nice post, and good to know about u..
however, i disgree with point 5, cos don't have 'fake' attitude buddy.. im just so cool :-)

Anu Russell said...


ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Keshi: Thanks Keshi. God bless you. Have a gret BDay.:)))

@Babi: Thanks, i would shortly visit your blog for sure. Give me a bit of time, :))))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Anu: Thanks. I am glad:))))

@Emaan: You are coool, ya i saw your picture, you are cool and handsome, young lad:)))))