Saturday 18 July 2009

A manifestation ( a Flash Fiction)


The spider slinked on the wall--A black, ominous creature with certain hex in its walk; like a gorgeous serpent budge. Its glare, like reflect of sun's radiance.His ogle pored over it, absorbing its grandeur to the bound. He begins to desire it. If he becomes it, he could stir to the next house and panorama Geetha's unclothed body. Geetha: his neighbor and the enchantress.

Abruptly, he is transformed, for he by no means noticed the passing conjurer of the murky magic. His each hand, slashed into four, to form four each on both sides. His body raises dim, like the spreading mystical. He is altered to the analogous spider. He moved to the adjoining home of Geetha.

There she goes, hastily to the bathroom. He trails.

Slinging on the wall, he peeks downwards. She hangs the towel on a hook and unbuttons her blouse; the first button, the second and then the last. He gapes with the lustfulness of a rapist.

She unclothes her brassiere, her delightful breasts on flaunt. She untangles her underskirt and it plummets on to the ground. Her last bit of obscurity is removed; her ambiguous, clothed self, transformed to a palpable manifestation.

Suddenly, he is trampled by a powerful bite. He, in heightened cupidity of the moment failed to notice the larger marauder, lurking in the backdrop. The pain was inconceivable, numerous drops of tears dropped on the floor, unobserved by the tininess of it.

The lizard ingested the spider, delighted with its catch and the subtle savor of its body fluid. It licked its gluttonous lips, unaware of its kill; the kill being its own sibling. He too had wished on that fateful afternoon; out of enormous thirst for the spectacle of a nude feminine body.

"Triiiiiing, triiiing, triiiiing."

The far-away resonance of an alarm clock ringing, and then a loud scream, "Sasi, O Sasi, Getup now, its six, this lazy boy, he will fail again this year."



52 comments:

Gayathri said...

Am i the first one?how come??:O
anyway,my dear ZB,i belong to the less brainy,naive ones..pls enlighten me! :)

ZB said...

so you have finally accepted, huh?::D

Hey, its fairly simple. Two brothers make a wish, that they turn to a creepy creature so that they can crawl into the bathroom of their neighbor Geetha, while she baths. And that wish is granted by a wizard who happens to pass by and hears them. and they are transformed.

Rest is what you get as climax and anti-climax. If i reveal that that then i kill my own story.

Perhaps i should send this to Anurag Kashyap, he would make it a short DARK movie. Talk about self praise. :))))))

ZB said...

Gay3: I for once thought that you of all people should get the story. Hummm:))

Swatantra said...

Picture is beautiful!! How's your daughter doing!!

P said...

didnt u post this one before?/ i thought i had read... its gud wrk none the less

ZB said...

@P: Yea, you are right. I had posted this before. And i thought noone read this before. Thanks, WOW, someone atleast got it. :))

Sucharita Sarkar said...

dark and dangerous stuff! Noir fiction. I needed that explanatory comment from you to G3 to realise the meaning, although I was guessing more or less on the same lines!

HaRy!! said...

boy ZB , wish i cud write like that one day :)! that was a speechless write. Wonder where yu rack em up in yur brain! swell!

Raj said...

o_0 spectacular

if i think i got that right, its a masterpiece.

Raj said...

ps: wud u mind if i use that concept of transformation somewhere and make a new story sumtym??? its rather catchy and i think i cud definitely make sumthin outta it.

Neha said...

wow!!!thats wat i call mind blowing...dude, the day i reach at this level, i will start with my book...which will take years i guess...a fantabulous post..keep blogging and sharing masterpieces like ths one.. :)

ZB said...

@ Sucharita: It is DARK and DANGEROUS. Yea, Noir Fiction, as they call in french.:))

@Hary: I am speechless. Thnks is all that i can utter.

@Scarlet: WOW< thanks. Please go ahead. It would be interesting. Let me know when you post. :)

@Neha: Thanks. :))

Gymnast said...

Hey there ZB , i've been reading your blog for quite sometime and think i know your style of writing. And when i read this post , i had the feeling that you couldn have written this . So i googled it. I got this -

http://mncworld.sulekha.com/blog/post/2009/04/a-manifestation.htm

Can you explain? I am confused.

ZB said...

@Gymnast: Hehe, thanks. I am glad that you cared so much that you googled. That blog in Sulekha (MaiR) is mine. I wrote it there and then i stopped that blog, to start it here. Fiction has to be written in a different way. My ruminating posts are different. ANY FURTHER DOUBTS:))))

ZB said...

@Gymnast. Go see it after 5 minutes. You will find it deleted and a post saying Hi to you. :)))

Gymnast said...

oh lol..ok ok. Then i must congratulate you. This post is SO much better and well-worded than your other ones. That i just couldnt believe the transformation.

And sorry. i wish i the ground would open up and take me.

ZB said...

@Gymnast: Hey, hell no. I am glad that you expressed it. That goes to show that you have really read my blog posts and i am thankful to you for that. Cheers:))

Gymnast said...

I am sorry ZB . *Slapping self"

Gymnast said...

i am REALLY sorry. But i just had to ask you that. Or else i would never be able to read your posts with the same about of interest and enthusiasm. Sorry again.

ZB said...

@Gymnast: I am extremely glad that you asked that, and i could prove myself. NO, please dont feel bad. You have every right to ask someone of the authenticity.

I can write in different ways. I try to add simplicity and bit of humour in posts and i can also write serious stuff. No hard feeling please.:))

Gymnast said...

*Sheepish Grin* I AM a stupid stupid stupid girl.

Pesto Sauce said...

Girls can get even spiders in trouble

rahul s said...

hey I had hectic travels last week.And yea..some of my friend went behind big things and endedup no where..I was thinkin of the same durin my travel n when i saw almost same topic in ure post also... nice one..

The Panorama said...

Last but hopefully not the least to leave a comment:) I must confess that I didn't get it either but am feeling mentally lethargic these days..:-D

It is a good story , specially the climax...had me laughing!

Aparna said...

Since all the readers before me have already discussed the story and you have very nicely explained it to us, I will not even go there.
I just want to tell you that no self respecting girl will ever take a bath in a bathroom which has lizard and spiders in it. She will call her chivalrous brother or husband to sanitise the bathroom before even entering it. Ask me.My brother did for me before marriage, and now my husband does it. When it comes to bathrooms, no creepy crawlies please.

ZB said...

@Aparna: hehe, right.When i was small, when we went to kerala for vacations, the toilets used to have somany creepy crawlies...lizards, spiders. So this story stems from that experience and FANTASY combined.:))))

ZB said...

@panorama: Why so? OK, i understand this is a complex story. One need to be really crazy to understand it.:)

@Rahul, Pesto: Thanks:)

Aparna said...

My god, ZB,I am rich!!
But seriously, what does mean? And how do I get that money? I am rubbing my hands in anticipation! And how do they get to that ridiculous figure? I sense something is not right here.

ekta khetan said...

Gosh..What a juicy childhood dreams sasi saw...Did he slept after seeing "mujhe iss jungle se bachao" episode? Lolz

ekta khetan said...

Gosh..What a juicy childhood dreams sasi saw...Did he slept after seeing "mujhe iss jungle se bachao" episode? Lolz

Anonymous said...

No words to express exactly what I feel. I was also wondering whether "you" wrote it. I was happier not knowing about these fantasies. God, Spiders and Lizards.How do I face them now. ;-)

R. Ramesh said...

i enjoyed the post and the dishyum dishyum gymnast comments..lol...i liked the last para, naturally because it gave the twist..keep up the gr8 work buddy..cheers.

Nona said...

You are right! This is perfect "Anurag Kashyap" material.

Shrinath Vashishtha said...

Oh, hi!
Nice to see my half-namesake, here, running an interesting blog, so much so that I feel like joining it through Google's Friend Connect.

Cheers, bro!!! Do keep me posted and how about exploring my domicile...?

Welcome to ANDAMAN & NICOBAR ISLANDS THE HISTORIC INDIAN CORAL ISLANDS...

Kavita Saharia said...

i enjoyed the story as much as the comments...you have great imagination....Anurag Kashyap,..perfect choice..

Kavita Saharia said...

One more thing...the picture is scary...just goes very perfect with the story...write more often plz

Keshi said...

omg I hate spiders ewwwwwwwww! *faints*


Keshi.

Supriya Dutta said...

iikkks..i could not read tyhe first few lines because of that crazy pic...Lizard and spider..Ohh my God...wat disgusting combo...

sorry i cannot say much on the writing...the pic was haunting and therefore i couldn't concentrate...

anamika said...

I liked the ending most..horror man..This should be surely a nightmare atleast for the girls who is having a bath.

ZB said...

Thanks all LADIES and GENTLEMEN.

@Priya, Keshi: WHat? You just saw the photographs and commented? What about the story? What an excuse sirjee. Just kidding,But try reading this story. Its lille tough but once you know what it is, you would love it. thanks.:)))

P said...

feels like you are an old friend all thanks to your daily blogs which i read right after i finish TOI And USA today! :)

BTW you shd visit mum's site:

http://theninthera.blogspot.com/2007/09/mate.html

I LOVE this one! :)

P said...

yup...that is hers! she is something! :) And my nanni is another step ahead.. dont ask! too high standards to match!! :P

and i have repeatedly told u that I really like your style! :)
AAAHAH! have i earned enough brownie points for a blog award of my own??!! :P

But seriously! that's why ur blog stars on my morning reading list!

Anonymous said...

I absolutely love the climax which is usually the anticlimax of all your stories...!! where so you get such plots from? stupendous work :)

SAHITYIKA said...

wht to say yaar..
to understand.. had to read the comments..
by d way.. its horrifying.. :(

ZB said...

@P: Thanks buddy.:0

@Ivy:Thanks, it just come, god knows from where. hope it keeps coming. :)

@Sahityika: Thanks for dropping by. Yea, its a bit complex and a fantasy. But thanks for trying it. :)

ekta khetan said...

Gosh 45 commenst Zillion, you are rocking!!!

Keshi said...

I read it Zillion :) Just that some parts of the FANTASY was a bit too much for my digestive system to comment haha!

Nice write-up tho...u hv the creativity in ya.


Keshi.

ZB said...

@Numero: Yey, woohooooo, i am great and ricking, thanks for making it 46.

@Keshi: iam? But you beat me. you are one of the finest creative minds in the blogospear. seriously you would go places. you are intelligent, witty, funny, and dont take yourself seriously.laughing at self is the biggest quality anyone can have.:))))

Ida said...

Oh my! that's some imagination!! But even in a fantasy I don't wanna be a lizard!! Hee-hee! Transfomations and stories related to them have always intrigued me and this was not different. Until you broke the suspense with the last part, I was creating stories of my own!

ZB said...

@Ida: Thanks buddy. What stories were you creating. Come up with one of them. i dig stories. :)

Keshi said...

gee tnxx! I guess we all r uniquely creative :)

Keshi.

Urmi said...

I enjoyed the post but the picture is very scary but I appreciate that you have taken nice shot.I am very much scared of lizard more than that feel irritated.