Saturday, 25 July 2009

His love life- A story

Note: This is an attempt at writing a 'Neo-Realistic' short story, let me know how it went.Dont ask me again if this is autobiographical. All my stories are. Period! :D


The first instance he saw Deepali, he found her rather unappealing. She didn’t go with his idea of beauty. A slim; as slim as to be called an underweight, and short bob cut hair. It was she who approached him first, for a little office related qualm and he noticed her fragrance-A fruity scent; rather pleasant; a pretty smile and a suave walk. There was some strange sophistication in her in entirety.
Not that he was one womanizer; he preferred more plain types, the homely ones. She tried to come closer to him, as if she needed him, or so he felt when she came very close to him, so much that he felt her breath. He tried to avoid her, displaying his not so pleasing face while she smiled. He made his displeasure fairly evident. She invited him for lunch, but he declined. She tried to bridge the space between them but he tried to move further. She tried knowing him but he kept himself blocked. All this merely since he found her unattractive, Not my type, he would often prove to himself.
The only instance of togetherness was when they had lunch together, that too just once, but he had preferred to keep his silence. She had tried to open up but bunged out of his recluse.
***************************************************************************

Rahul was not handsome in more conventional ways, not so much as him. It was Rahul who was his first friend in this city, since he moved here five years ago. A very pleasant man and a charmer.

It was Rahul who had arranged a stay for him. He had been so helpful to him all these years. They often had lunch or dinner together or occasionally went for a cinema. There was not a single staff in the office who disliked Rahul.
It was he who had introduced Rahul to Deepali. Rahul had a hand shake and it seemed Deepali liked his company. They appeared bonded, in no time. Rahul and Deepali came together for work and left together after work. They shared lunch together. Rahul would make her taste her Tiffin, which he too had tasted on several occasions. Rahul’s mother made Tiffin; so delicious and nourishing.

They appeared like genuine close friends, too close for his probing eyes. He started to wonder what she had found in him. Rahul wasn’t as handsome as him.
she wanted to come closer to him too, but he had raised a wall. Not his type, not so beautiful: he had thought .But why was he upset now? was he jealous?
He saw things change before his eyes. She would come to office on his Kinetic Honda and leave with him. Rahul looked much nice-looking with a woman, ever than before and Deepali looked inundated but euphoric.

He starting dreaming about the two. He wondered if She went home after work. He was sure Rahul would be having dinner with her everyday. They would be spending time together till wee hours of the morning. He wondered if they slept together. He soon began to lose sleep.

On one of the Sundays he spotted the two, riding past him, not giving a glace to his staring self. She had cuddled him from behind, he could see that. The embrace appeared too tight, as if they were life partners. He turned red in boundless jealousy .
He imagined them in cinema theaters, ice-cream parlors, hands tied, too close and passionate. He spent nights sleeplessly.

He started turning to her. He would pass her desk several times, pretending to smile at her, trying to catch her interest. She would grin back and he would ask her silly questions. She would answer back to him, in ‘yes’ and ‘no’. The fire in his heart burgeoning.

She emerged much beautiful than before. He couldn’t take his eyes from her. Her Churidars looked the most trendy, her style the most appealing. He took notice of minute details about her style. Everything about her was enchanting. Her sandal was those he had never seen on a woman’s feet, so elegant and graceful. Her matching bangles looked straight out of a movie frame. Green bangles for green churidar, red for red. Her short hairs danced with her mesmerizing walk, like a suave serpent. He longed for her, her companionship, her hug.

He decided to buy a Scooter. Not the same as Rahul, all would think this as imitation. He decided on Honda Activa.He hoped for her closeness, she behind him and embracing him, like how she did to Rahul. He burned in envy.

One day she appeared in pain. She had held her stomach tight, as if suffering from a burly stomachache. He went near her to ask and she looked at him, into his eyes. He asked her if he could help her with anything, she smiled back naughtily. She told him that it happens to her every month. She was having her day of the months.
That night, his mind went back in reverse; again and again, the scene of the day. Her pain and her way of holding her stomach. Her disclosure about her periods, with that naughty, mischievous smile. A smile formed in his eyes unknowingly. He was in love with her, her femininity, her everything. In entirety, everything about her was so alluring.

“I would propose her”, he told himself during one of the sleepless nights.
It was a week later that he was informed the news about his transfer. He was absolutely wrecked. He was transferred to Kerala, some god forbidden land, some fools calling themselves the “gods own country”. That’s the height of self praise. He hated this news, about his transfer.

He had one more week before his reporting date. He made numerous plans of proposing her. He approached her myriad times, all in his heightened anxious minutes. He just couldn’t cuff it up. He changed the subject every time she came near his sight. He felt choked, his head getting crammed with blood, like a puffer fish.
At last, it was the day of departure. Office had arranged a send off for him. Light snacks and soft drinks were arranged and he was asked to speak about his experience, working in that office for 5 years. He couldn’t care much of the 5 years except for the last 6 months, the time Deepali had walked into the office and his miserable life.
He couldn’t speak much, he felt his mouth turn a traitor against him. It was Deepali who walked in, to offer his sendoff gift, neatly packet in a glittery wrap paper. With a card.

The crowd dispersed and the office was shut by the watchman. Deepali and Rahul waited for him at the entrance.
“Thanks a lot, I really appreciate your help.” He heard Deepali talk.

He started to say something, but stopped midway, wondering what it was that he wanted to utter. Nothing, he had nothing to speak.
“And one more thing. A very big thanks for Introducing Rahul. “ she was smiling, her most enthralling smile, he felt he would collapse, he felt giddy.
He forced a smile, shook hands with both and walked towards his scooter.
It was after reaching home that he opened his gift. It was a set of Parker pens and a Gold ring.

He opened the greeting card. It was from Deepali, thanking him personally, from her and Rahul, thanking him for making them meet. The inscription also mentioned that they would call him and inform him of their Engagement, once things were planned.
He tore the greeting card. He sat on the sofa and wept, covering his face, like a child.
The new office was plusher than his previous, at least the building looked well maintained. Kerala was indeed pleasant, though still too exaggerated to be called “gods own country”, nevertheless he agreed in it, partly.
His eyes panned, as he walked into his cubicle, as if searching for a Deepali. He wasn’t sure if there would be ever a Deepali in his life. Never. There are not many with all the goodies in one package. He smiled obliquely.

He heard cacophony of slender reverberations, all sorts of murmurs, mixture of masculine and feminine. His ears tried filtering the faint Feminine whispers dallying in the air. He heard a melodious sigh.
Devika, the office clerk. An enthralling beauty, But with long hairs unlike Deepali, plumper than Deepali and with the unlike captivating movements. But all the same, a beauty. He sighed.

He asked her out for Lunch. She agreed outright. He was pleased with his labor and providence. What if no Deepali, he would have a woman for himself. He would take her in his Kinetic Honda. “Oops, not Kinetic but Honda activa”. He corrected himself. He would go to Ice cream parlor, cinema theatre, have Lunch and dinner together. One day he would even take her home. Like Rahul and Deepali. He wanted to disagree with himself. No, unlike them.

He would invite Devika for dinner tonight. She had agreed for Lunch without any hesitation. She would be too willing.

Five o clock was announced by sharp ringing of the large Ajantha clock, hanging on the office wall. He rushed out of his cubicle towards Devika. She was in an attempt to leave hurriedly. He stopped her with his forwarded hand. He was panting, almost like a dog.
“Hey, Devika. Thought of asking you something.” He asked after a while, controlling his doglike panting.
“What”, she asked with a hint of alarm.
“Thought, if you would be free, why not we have dinner together.” He said looking down, trying hard to sound casual and cool.
She nodded as if she understood something very concealed.
“ Hey, but how come you want us to join you? For dinner, but beware we are bad eaters. My husband is worse than me. Be sure of your wallet before inviting us.” She was almost chuckling in excitement, her sarcasm quite evident.

He smiled awkwardly and walked towards his cubicle. He felt as if he had been slapped on his cheeks by a hard-hitting hand. He sat on his rotating chair and looked at the ceiling, as if in deep thoughts. He appeared as if he was reflecting on life and its infinite puzzles and knottiness.

************************************************************************************

Deepali cried. She had been crying ever since she was ditched by Rahul. He had told her about his other love. He was two timing her ever since she had known him.
She hated men. She felt ugly about herself. She couldn’t look into the mirror. No men found her attractive. Her office colleague Arun, who was transferred, always ignored her, as if she was some hundred year old leathery woman. She had found him attractive, but if only he found her the same. He had always made her feel unwanted. Like he hated her from the day he laid his sight on her. She cried more noisily.

35 comments:

extremity said...

uyyo ! whats d problem wth these guys..all sick? u directed on somethng like stupidity of relationships ?

extremity said...

well.. neorealistic indeed..its so damn true.this is all wats happening arround.the very phony bastards

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Extremity: Well, I meant something like what you mentioned *Stupidity of relationships*, but then the fact is nothing in this world can be generalized. So this is a simple story of a DUDE called Arun. :)

ZiLliOnBiG said...

Its very complex, at the way we form relationships. Probably we like the persons face, we like his hair, we like the way he moves or probably some unknown hint our heart provides us.Thats also the case with our hatred. Both are our very own perceptions.

Infact the whole world is different, than what it actually is. Its mere a figment of our imagination and perception. Bhagwat Geetha rightly calls everything MAYA.So true.:)

Aparna said...

What is neo-realism?
The story was sad. I do not like the fact that Rahul cheated. And Arun should perhaps have been more cautious before thinking of pursuing a new relationship. But I do not worry about him as much I worry about Deepali. His pride was hurt where as her self esteem and heart were injured. Arun perhaps would bounce back but I'm not sure about the girl, she will remain bitter for a long time.

ZiLliOnBiG said...
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ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Aparna: Neo-realism is narrating in a way which makes the reader think its a real life event and not imaginary. I.e without much ados and touchups, similar to movies without expressive BGM or Tricky camera angles.Plain and realistic.

Even Deepali would bounce back. Time can heal any wound. And humans are capable of adapting, just give a bit of time. Thats why they say, ***Suicide is the permanent solution to a temporary problem***.

~ manish ~ said...

I had a go on neo-realism in the college mag. Guess how it worked for me. :-) It was an awesome experience!

N about all this lovey-dovey things, time is a great healer. Till then, keep crying!

ivy_^^ said...

two lost souls..both longed for love and belonginess but found despair and disappointement as a companion instead. awww...
why cnt people be more forthright wid thr feelings? if they were then none of this wud have happnd !!!

Choco said...

I love this tale...I know the ending was sad and kinda like to be continued (hope you do)...but as I was reading it I was sooo curious about will he won't he propose...what will she say...will he come back from God forsaken country....Oh the suspense....Very well told! :)

PS: Thanks for dropping by my blog. Much appreciated :)
Cheers.

Neha said...

Zillionbig, the end made the whole story beautiful...i knw it was not a very happy ending, but thts the beauty of ur story telling according to me...i really like ur style...and the day i get sme spare time, i would love to read ur older posts...wish i could also come up with something like this...very impressive post :)

Jyothi said...

Was that the ending?Don't they meet. Of course not, this is not a fairy tale right? But tell me something. Deepali goes after Rahul when she doesn't get Arun's attention. Why was she so desperate to be in love. Love happens yaar. Its never planned. And if it was genuine, they will meet again.Just like in fairy tales.

Time doesn't heal completely.Pain stays on forever in some corner of the heart.

The Panorama said...

Good story and I liked the end...it was a surprise twist...didn't expect that one. Well done:)

The abstract scientist said...

Hey ZB,
Cool story man. It happens all the time and I wonder when will it end. We keep waiting for the Miss universe of our dreams and she never comes. I am still looking and I hope I shall find mine. If not there is always an arrangedmarriage and another girl to listen to all my stories of the past.

Nona said...

The story was sad. But your writing was good.

The part where Arun runs after Devika was not very convincing. As a writer, you may have a reason to make the character behave that way. But as a reader, I was not able to find it. It is kinda written in between the lines. :)

P said...

AAh!!
you started with a love triangle and ended with a double tragedy!!
i have had friends who were two timed... and BELIEVE me they regretted! my girl friends are feisty! :P

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Manish: Ok so had a stint with neo-realism, wow, thats good. Thanks buddy:)

@Ivy: I agree with you, **why cnt people be more forthright wid thr feelings?** , if would be so , i would have ended up with 3-4 wives and few extramarital relations. hehe, just kidding.:))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Choco: Thanks buddy, pleasure was entirely mine. :)

@Neha: Thanks buddy. Why not, you could also write. Just remember some incidence in your life which moved you, and search around how you could connect and make a tale. Dont worry about it being politically correct, or being a story which doesnt end in happy ending. I too like stories which have HAPPY ENDING, but alas, life is nor fair. :)

ZiLliOnBiG said...
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ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Panaroma: Thanks, i am glad that you liked. :)

@ Abstract:Thanks, hey, dont wait for LOVE TO HAPPEN. It Never happens automatically. Thats only in movies, in real world( neo-realism remember) it has to be planned, and executed, a'la MBA style.Try locate the SUBJECT, plan you attack and then wait. If was meant for you, she would come back. Ask me, if you want more lessons, i would be glad.i have tremendous experience, hehe:))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Nona: Thanks, i am glad.

It was not convincing? Why? Love in real life, is like an addiction. Once a person tastes blood(Love), she/he would chase it for sure, for life. Arun wanted a replacement for Deepali. He was restless, only a replacement could get his restless mind to rest.A solace for his mind. Why was it not convincing?

We Indians are too politically correct. Its time we discard statements like, Love happens its destiny, First life is true love( Darn, i dont even remember my first love, probably in when i was in LKG?), A woman is never desperate for love, a woman never has lust or desire, love is blind, it can never be planned. All are cliches and according to me its all bullshit. :))


@P: Now, thats what i call neo-realism. Thanks for sharing. Life is never politically correct. we all stray, we all lust for that skirt with Sexy Legs thing. dont we, we are all humans.i know a lot of people who two time. Thanks:))

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@Jyothi: who isnt desperate for LOVE. If someone says so, probably he/she is lying. Before marriage we want to be loved by a beautiful specimen of the opposite sex. If no, then something he/she isnt normal.
Love happens is an old CLICHE. it can also be planned. I wooed my wife, and she used to HATE me. I planned and step by step wooed her. Does love really just hAPPENs? In movies may be.

Haha, you are largely influenced by fairy tales, grow up, life isnt a fairy tale.

Re:**Time doesn't heal completely.Pain stays on forever in some corner of the heart.**, i dont completely agree with you. Not all pain remains. OK, some pains do last but very few. My 95 % of pain is nomore a PAIN. I laugh at some of the so called PAINFUL incidences of the past. Dont you? Tell me....:)

For once i thought you read the post completely, and not get influenced by others comment and comment. Thanks :D

le embrouille blogueur said...

Well done ... a little predictable though ... maybe because it is neo-realistic ...keep up the good work !!

Gymnast said...

Neo realism ? My god ! Heard of neo-palladianism , neo - classicism .. and now i add neo-realism to my dictionary.

Sad story , ZB. I have seem many Aruns in my college as well.

Strange are the workings of human mind. Forever imbalanced. Perhaps Arun should have been a little more balanced.

sujata said...

Like the new look of the blog and the changes made..its a sad story but a very realsitic one..do people cheat or are they just circumstances? I could never understand that a guy/girl will actually plan and cheat somebody..i dont think that happens to normal ppl..i think people just fall out of love..

ZiLliOnBiG said...

@LEB: You are right, its very predictable and common bolliwoodish story. It was just a writing practice, experimenting with treatment. Thanks :)

@Gymnast:hehe add that to ur dictionary.

Arun is love sick, to quote Garcia Marquez **that lovesickness is a literal illness, a disease comparable to cholera**....

@Sujata:Thanks, welcome back. But who cheats? Ok, the last part where rahul cheats, it happens all around us, all the time. I know atleast 5 people, who have been dumped by their bf/gf for a better looking or richer person. So many time people just get into a relationship for the heck of it, once the thrill is out its BREAKUP TIME.:)

wandering thoughts said...
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wandering thoughts said...

the confusion within ourselves about what we want is ver nicely expressed ....very well written story , well captured emotions...but why neo-classical? its an ages old dilema ,as far as i see it...not wanting what we get and realising its value after we lose it.... as for the autobiographical bit ... hmmm, you are the rahul in the story ,:)

anamika said...

Sitting in my office.I hurridly read the story and in between got confused between rahul and Arun..Will read it again after a while.:d

Lone Survivor said...

It feels more wonderful when even u cant separate reality from fiction.

Truth is stranger than fiction!

Priya said...

eh ZB: i read this on Sunday but cldnt comment then...liked your post and had a good laugh at the "looser-like-attitude" of the protagonist. :D..no i think i felt a little more for Diplai even...i mean i liked you narration...pretty much as alwayssss. :D:D

Kaddu said...

There u are... completely summed up "MAN" in a nutshell! When someone is there for u, you can't appreciate her. When u think u are abt to lose her, u go nuts and ur jealous possessive mind conjures up all kinds of irrational thoughts. But in the end, you never are able to find the guts to simply "go all the way"! And they say women are the "weaker" sex! I bet it was a man who said this... to cover up his own insecurities! Huhhh!

My angry outburst proves it is written very well... but I beg you yaar... write happy stuff in future... there's already too much of reality in life. Such painful pieces only highlight the darkness of night... would be so good to read something refreshing... something that reminds one of the beauty of the rainbows...

Gayathri said...

Well,you've got some obsession with this name arun or is that ur real name??ve seen a mention,in previous posts too..
and abt the post..it really happens every time..the testosterone driven men go for girls with looks..and later find the real care that some hideous one gave,haunting..

btw,were u by any chance,a mech engr??

CoFfEe AnGeL said...

sigh.men.women.miscommunication.
sorry i cudnt read ur blog earlier... catching up slowly...good work pal.

CoFfEe AnGeL said...

ZB have u read my story on love?
http://acuppaconversation.blogspot.com/2009/04/totally-taboo-part-1.html

i really wonder what u would think of it.