Hallo frends……hope you guys are doin good. Me too is not doing
all that bhad. In fact I am doing good. Though Not as good as I like to be but
still not that bad that I crib about. I have not been in the mood to write
oflate for some unknown reason. Now that I have mentioned that I feel the reson
is more due to laziness than lack of any other reason. Of course I can come up
with any numbor of reasons for not writing a blog post but I want to be honest.
After all honesty is the best policy. But oflate I have also wondewred if
honesty is indeed the best policy. Yesterday I thought I would be honest,
sorry, in fact I didn’t think I just blub-blubered during a conversation with
my wife and I told her that I haven’t touched the threadmills for a whole
month.There she goes. I told her that running is not the only thing you can do
with a threadmill. I told her that it can be used very effectively to dry
cloths, especially underwears and banyans, and she was very furious with me. After
the conversation and ever since I have now second thots about being honest. In
fact I can save half of my troubles from not being honest.
Weather( or is it wheather) here is very fine. Yesterday
it rained and I felt I have reached Kerala all of a sudden. Then I vaited for
some more time for more rains and then I realized that one should never expect
too much in life and it was not Kerala. It stopped raining after just few
puddles of water on the streets unlike Kerala. Now I am waiting for more such
rains. Rains give me a feeling that I am back to the place I belong. It looks
cloudy, but winters are mostly cloudy so I think its winter-clouds and not
rain-rain-clouds.
Yesterday I shopped for cloths. Not that I have too much
money or I have become rich. I realized that I have very little cloths which I like
to wear and not I am forced to wear. I like to wear cloths that I like to wear.
I don’t like to wear cloths just because I have to wear them since I bought
them. You know what I mean?
I wanted a pair of jeans. SO I went to Marks &
spencers and then I searched for some jeans. Suddenly I realized that the
cloths there were rather boring and I decided to walk off and try somewhere
else. Then I went to NEXT and searched. One over-enthusiastic-over-selling
salesman came running to me and for a moment I thought he is going to kidnap
me. He suggested me lots of options, which I realized were the most expensive
of the lot. I smiled at him, my usual thanks-for-the-help-but-sorry smile and I
saw the smile on his face vaporize. I almost heard his unspoken words which iam
sure meant: bastard-you-come-to-waste-my-time-fuck-off….
Then I went to H&M and saw few nice cloths and
finally ended buying few t-shirts and jeans. I am happy and now waiting for
some occasion to wear them. I hope some occasion comes soon and I showoff my new
cloths. Life is tuff, one has to find occasions to wear cloths and not just buy
them.
The otherday I realized that I was leading a fast life.
The fastness of my life had sweeped into everything. As arundhati roy
says in The Dog of small things- it was sweeping into my life like tea from a
tea bag. I even ate very fast. Perhaps that’s why I gain weight too fast. My
wife eats very slowly, perhaps that’s why she is skinny. But my problem is that
I have no patience. What I want I want it now. I cant wait. I rush everywhere.
I rush in the bathroom, I rush when I brush my teeth. I even rush when I write
this. I just want to finish this stupid post and post it in my blog so that
someone comments on tham and my ego is inflated. I am an egoist. I need conformity.
I constantly want people to coime to me and tell me how good I am. I hate
everyone who is honest and tells me that I am as bad as most of the people in
the world. I even think very fast. Thoughts pass by as if it had an engine and
someone was knocking on the accelerator pads. So I am thinking of reducing the
pace. Now I want to just write slowly, word by word…. Letter by letter, and
think also slowly. But its dificlut. Its difficult coz like most humans, I am a
device of habit. I do everything out of habit I have formed since my birth. I
even think out of habit. Its not easy to come out of the bondage of habit. But I
should try and be slow. The pace can make me sick. The pace can even sweep into
time and make me age faster. By thinking slow, we live more. We age slowly. I don’t
know if its true but I feel it should be given a try. By the way, my dad is
several kilometers slower than me. Is it the age that had made him slow? Or is
it my greed to be successful and rich before 45 that has made me fast.But
whatever I don’t like the fastness. I like to be unhurried.
The other day I was watching the interview of Dalai lama
and was really impressed with him. He is a great spiritual leader and I believe
we all should give an ear to his teachings. Or perhaps just a bit more than few
ears.
That’s all. Nothing more to write. Take care and thanks
for dropping in. It feels great to write a non-sense post. Try it yourself sometime.Ciao.
5 comments:
zb. u r confused. :)
i miss kerela too...it rains cats and dogs there. and the dosas my neighbours used to make delicious!!! :)
liked the nonsense post. :P
ZB, what's up/ All well?
Still waiting for your nameless story to unfold:)
ZB, this is I guess the random most post from you...:))
I like random stuff! :)
I think I need to post something like this too. My readers will forget me otherwise...
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