Wednesday 16 December 2009

The jeans and the fastness of my life and my new found admiration for Dalai Lama and more.......




Hallo frends……hope you guys are doin good. Me too is not doing all that bhad. In fact I am doing good. Though Not as good as I like to be but still not that bad that I crib about. I have not been in the mood to write oflate for some unknown reason. Now that I have mentioned that I feel the reson is more due to laziness than lack of any other reason. Of course I can come up with any numbor of reasons for not writing a blog post but I want to be honest. After all honesty is the best policy. But oflate I have also wondewred if honesty is indeed the best policy. Yesterday I thought I would be honest, sorry, in fact I didn’t think I just blub-blubered during a conversation with my wife and I told her that I haven’t touched the threadmills for a whole month.There she goes. I told her that running is not the only thing you can do with a threadmill. I told her that it can be used very effectively to dry cloths, especially underwears and banyans, and she was very furious with me. After the conversation and ever since I have now second thots about being honest. In fact I can save half of my troubles from not being honest.

Weather( or is it wheather) here is very fine. Yesterday it rained and I felt I have reached Kerala all of a sudden. Then I vaited for some more time for more rains and then I realized that one should never expect too much in life and it was not Kerala. It stopped raining after just few puddles of water on the streets unlike Kerala. Now I am waiting for more such rains. Rains give me a feeling that I am back to the place I belong. It looks cloudy, but winters are mostly cloudy so I think its winter-clouds and not rain-rain-clouds.

Yesterday I shopped for cloths. Not that I have too much money or I have become rich. I realized that I have very little cloths which I like to wear and not I am forced to wear. I like to wear cloths that I like to wear. I don’t like to wear cloths just because I have to wear them since I bought them. You know what I mean?

I wanted a pair of jeans. SO I went to Marks & spencers and then I searched for some jeans. Suddenly I realized that the cloths there were rather boring and I decided to walk off and try somewhere else. Then I went to NEXT and searched. One over-enthusiastic-over-selling salesman came running to me and for a moment I thought he is going to kidnap me. He suggested me lots of options, which I realized were the most expensive of the lot. I smiled at him, my usual thanks-for-the-help-but-sorry smile and I saw the smile on his face vaporize. I almost heard his unspoken words which iam sure meant: bastard-you-come-to-waste-my-time-fuck-off….

Then I went to H&M and saw few nice cloths and finally ended buying few t-shirts and jeans. I am happy and now waiting for some occasion to wear them. I hope some occasion comes soon and I showoff my new cloths. Life is tuff, one has to find occasions to wear cloths and not just buy them.

The otherday I realized that I was leading a fast life. The fastness of my life had sweeped into everything. As arundhati roy says in The Dog of small things- it was sweeping into my life like tea from a tea bag. I even ate very fast. Perhaps that’s why I gain weight too fast. My wife eats very slowly, perhaps that’s why she is skinny. But my problem is that I have no patience. What I want I want it now. I cant wait. I rush everywhere. I rush in the bathroom, I rush when I brush my teeth. I even rush when I write this. I just want to finish this stupid post and post it in my blog so that someone comments on tham and my ego is inflated. I am an egoist. I need conformity. I constantly want people to coime to me and tell me how good I am. I hate everyone who is honest and tells me that I am as bad as most of the people in the world. I even think very fast. Thoughts pass by as if it had an engine and someone was knocking on the accelerator pads. So I am thinking of reducing the pace. Now I want to just write slowly, word by word…. Letter by letter, and think also slowly. But its dificlut. Its difficult coz like most humans, I am a device of habit. I do everything out of habit I have formed since my birth. I even think out of habit. Its not easy to come out of the bondage of habit. But I should try and be slow. The pace can make me sick. The pace can even sweep into time and make me age faster. By thinking slow, we live more. We age slowly. I don’t know if its true but I feel it should be given a try. By the way, my dad is several kilometers slower than me. Is it the age that had made him slow? Or is it my greed to be successful and rich before 45 that has made me fast.But whatever I don’t like the fastness. I like to be unhurried.

The other day I was watching the interview of Dalai lama and was really impressed with him. He is a great spiritual leader and I believe we all should give an ear to his teachings. Or perhaps just a bit more than few ears.

That’s all. Nothing more to write. Take care and thanks for dropping in. It feels great to write a non-sense post. Try it yourself sometime.Ciao.




5 comments:

Raj said...

zb. u r confused. :)
i miss kerela too...it rains cats and dogs there. and the dosas my neighbours used to make delicious!!! :)

liked the nonsense post. :P

ekta khetan said...

ZB, what's up/ All well?

Still waiting for your nameless story to unfold:)

Neha said...

ZB, this is I guess the random most post from you...:))

Ire said...

I like random stuff! :)

Aparna said...

I think I need to post something like this too. My readers will forget me otherwise...